It's August!

Weighed in yesterday. One scale said 160, one said 185. I was lifting weights trying to figure out why there was such a difference and thinking grandly that I preferred the scale in the woman's bathroom when two older gentleman talked about the scale's problems.

"Let's do a test" one said, grabbing (2) 25# weight from the Military press. They came back with giggles, the scale was exactly 25#s off, that's not that good for a gym to have, but at least I know my sources are right.

My eating habits the last two days are sure to have put on a couple pounds, not to mention that there's been too much going on with work to actually get to the gym, but I'm glad I'm down a bit.

The difference I've noticed? I'm wearing heels again, I don't know if my metabolism just kicked in or if it's right, but the weight is coming off better now that I've adopted my 4" back into my wardrobe. I wonder if it distributes better and that's the philosophy? I'm not postive, but in the mean time they aren't hiding away on my closet shelves anytime soon.

Tomorrow starts ...

In an act of Journaslism, tomorrow begins the "Social Experiment" for August. Tomorrow starts my creed to not drink unless there's going to be some action afterward - and to be specific action in the sexual sense.

Bike, bike, bike.

I started dog sitting yesterday (as their whines beckon me from upstairs as I type) and wasn't able to hit the gym yesterday so I woke up early this morning, packed their little bodies into my car, dropped them off at my place and hussled to the gym.

The downside of my gym is that almost 80% of their client base is older people. The other downside? It's in Milwaukee and today it's 98 degrees in the shade which means old-person stench holds in every crevice.

I went to the library yesterday to check out another book since my workouts seem to be more intense and longer when I read. I picked up Everyone Worth Knowing, a book by the same author of Devil Wears Prada. I was slightly delighted that it wasn't as good as Devil since I read that one so quickly, but still good in the sense that it occupied my time.

I did 55 minutes on the bike to start, tanned for 20 minutes (skin cancer I know - but it makes me stay. I always arrange my appointment for 1 hour to 1 1/2 hours from when I walk in) and bike for another 30, showered and headed home to check on the pups.

I know they desperately would like to frolic in the sun-forced weather outside the air conditioned walls; however, I'm afraid I'll pass out just walking out the front door. The ice-cold bottle of water I bought 2 blocks away from the gym was even luke-warm when I arrived. I know I'm being a baby compared to all you from the hot-zones that are competing with 100 plus degree weather - but I like my coolness.

Anyhow, the work out (according to the bike scale) was around 20 miles combined and about 250 calories. I justified eating a frozen, some what chocolate covered banana that one of my sister's kids (she owns and runs a day care) made and put in my freezer.

Now it's off to finding something that fits and is cool for this weather, packing up the pups and heading back to Tosa. At least in their own house they don't whine so much.

Weight today: A pathetic 178.

What's today looking like?

I did an hour of cardio this morning and drank lots of water. I mean - I didn't even touch a soda, the worst thing I put in my system was a propel.

About 1:00 I wasn't just hungry - but starving. Knowing I would have baseball after work and then the gym again, I justified eating nachos.

I never actually play on our team, but the opposite team was short one girl so I got drafted over there. I actually enjoyed it alot - they were appreciative of my participation. Because I was catching for my team, I kept the cackling to a minimum and hoped my team would do the same. One little, and pardon this, bitch yells from the outfield while I was batting "Go our best player." Sarcastically as she hussles the outfield in. Hey guess what - I'm still on your god damn team.

I took the aggression back to the gym for 1/2 hour of weights and cardio. This morning the scale tipped in at 183, I'm hoping it tips below that tomorrow morning.

I'm sitting here hungry as a devil, but it's almost 10 so I don't want to eat - plus it'll be a bright and early morning tomorrow since I have to be to work by 8.

Worst cashier. Ever.

Not feeling too hot since I'm working out and watching my food/calories/etc and not losing, but gaining weight. This morning I over slept (see my regular blog for details - no, did not get any) and only worked out for 15 minutes. Then it was a co-workers birthday and feeling crappy about the weight gain I indulged - too much. My calorie intake today was easily around 3,000.

The good news is that I resisted the need to eat pizza at my networking event, but I did down a Mountain Dew - my 5th (yes 5TH!) soda of the day. I ducked out at 8:00 and headed to the gas station to get smokes.

I arrived at a very ghetto-like gas station, bullet proof glass and all. I walked up to the window and asked for my regular smokes and handed my credit card over.

He asked if I was really that person, I said it was - according to my ID and handed over my card. He informed me I was bigger than the picture. Heavier. Fatter. Did he really need to clarify all three adjectives to me? Shit. Bigger means all those things.

I was driving home, ready to cry. Nothing seems to be working. Everyone keeps saying, "It'll take time" I've been busting my butt for a month and gained 20 lbs. I thought about stopping for a drink, but the words kept echoing in my mind. I decided to go to the gym.

I pounded out an additional 55 minutes or 25 km/miles. How do you know which one the bike is registering at? I assumed KM and not miles which is about 15 miles. Then I went home.

I'm fed up. There is nothing to do but work out like crazy so starting tomorrow I'm back on routine. And no more soda. We'll see, won't we?

Starting Over ...

There's a reason why I haven't posted since May. I can blame it on the change of jobs, the losing my gym membership (got a deal through the last place I worked), the change of hours, etc. But the down and dirty truth is that I let myself go.

Sick of the view in the mirror, I got another membership at my old gym (1/2 hoping the hottie sales guy was still there, but he wasn't) - it was a sign I was doing the right thing, there was a "No contract, no joining fee" special and I got money off because of my new insurance policy - SCORE.

Every day for the past three weeks I have been watching what I was eating, consuming less alchol, doing weights, an hour of cardio (at least) six days a week trying to make a difference, but the scale keeps jumping in the wrong direction.

I'm praying for the fact that my Depo shot is finally wearing off and I'm bloated because I haven't gotten my period in a year and a half (no worries - haven't had sex in two years) and the people around me are believing that a year and a half of PMS is just starting to show for the reason why it's not peeling off, but I'm afraid that's all pseudo.

So I have started blogging again. As of today - my weight is 182. Sigh.

Calorie Count!

So today's count ...

Propel in AM - 25c
Peanutbutter sandwich for breakfast - 410 (ouch! should've looked before I ate)
Instant Lunch for lunch - 290 calories
Turkey sandwich - 220 calories

Total - 935 calories so far, looks like a light dinner!

Today's Count

Not so good on the calorie count today ...

Special K - 150 calories
Cream of broccoli soup - 190 calories
Chicken Wrap - 400 calories (yikes!)
Mountain Dew - 170 calories (I think, forgot to look)

For dinner I will be having a SmartOnes frozen meal - total of 220 calories.

Total of 1130 ... Yeah 70 under!

Tonight I'm squishing the fat in a little pilates as well! :) That stuff makes you ache!

The War of the Weight.

I've been managing to count everything pretty regularly.

Yesterday was a little odd - we were at an expo all day which meant concession foods and trade show booths handing out candy and cookies. I managed to stick with my Special K in the morning, a piece of pizza (just cheese) for lunch, one cookie (I'm human - couldn't resist!), a couple cheese fries during a client meeting and a salad for dinner. Grand total for the day 1400. Not the 1200 that I was aiming for ...

But today is a new day. Had my Special K for breakfast, will eat noodles and veggies for lunch (though I am ridiculously craving a ceasar wrap...) and for dinner will probably have a salad of some sorts. We'll count as the day goes on. So far - 150 calories.

A New Day

So today starts the get thin program.

For breakfast I had Special K with skim milk - 150 calories.

I found that if I prepare things in cups, I'm not tempted to overfill so I can stick with the suggested serving size.

Today for lunch I should be having rice, veggies and shrimp - a total of 180 calories. I say should because the Aunts are in town and in the area, so we may have lunch at a restaurant, in which I will stick to a salad of sorts. :) Yeah! Calorie counting ...

Bad. Bad. Bad.

I keep getting comments on my other blog and on this one about where I am and how I'm doing. The truth is, the recent life upheavel I've gone through has not been good for the dieting part of my life, but great for my mental state.

In the last two months, I have quit the job I hated and started the job I love. It is a miracle in that small changes can change your entire outlook. I was completely lost in why I was so miserable. Was it my weight? Not having a boyfriend? Living at home? Money? Lack of control over my life? Or was it my job? I kept trying to change the things in my life. I started losing weight, but that didn't make me deliriously happy. I tried dating, granted they weren't the best apples in the bushel, but I was trying and that left me with a Baby's Daddy's Girlfriend yelling at me (check out the Single in the City blog for more), I couldn't change living at home and being gone left me feeling like a bad cat mommy and led to more arguments about my place not being clean. Then, I quit my agency job.

I started working my new job and found that the cards started laying in place. I love my job and that's affected EVERYTHING. I like where I work, there is income potential more so then at the last place, I get paid to network which means I go out and meet decent people, because I am happy I don't feel miserable in my place. The bad part is happy glee has led to less of a focus on calorie intake and networking has led to consuming more coffee and drinks. Not working the old job means I don't have a free gym membership - so at this point I don't know how much I weigh, I just know it's more than two months ago.

Now that everything else is in order, it's time to start concentrating on me again. This blog will become active once more in my quest to conqueor my belly.

Lack of posts ...

That shows my lack of enthusiasim for the gym regement I've been on for the last eight months. It's so easy to get discouraged when you go from losing five pounds easily to nothing over two months - well I'm back!

I've been going to the gym on limited time, discouraged by the lack of inches and numbers on the scale going down. I'm still going, doing mostly cardio and limited weights and I'm still sort-of watching my caloric intake. All and all I haven't been doing well though.

After a weekend of pigging out and deciding to sleep in on Monday morning, I encouraged myself to get up and go to a limited morning routine. This week is hectic, I'm booked almost every night - so it's important that I get up and at least get in my 15-20 cardio.

My plateau has been discouraging, but after research I found that if I switch up my routine and increase my protien intake (which is limited due to my limited funds) I may have better results. So lately I've been eating more chicken and peanut butter and less soups and salads hoping that the numbers go down.

Well, and I'm almost afraid to put this in print, my weight went down! This morning I was 152.5 - I weighed myself three times thinking that just couldn't be right! I'm sure I've lost a little bit of muscle since I'm not working out very much, but it was encouraging to see that some work is paying off. I have a peanut butter sandwich (on wheat bread) for breakfast and a chicken SmartOnes meal for lunch. I'm also trying to get more healthy dairy (yogurts & milk instead of cheeses) in my diet, hoping all this will pay off!

Taking a break ...

I took a break from the gym today, call it a mental health day or what not, but no gym for me.

Doing pretty good on the eating - I did sneak in two minature peppermint patties and a diet black cherry vanilla coke (o calories) as sweet treats and after all the hardwork for our pitch - one of our art directors bought coffee. I'm hacking all and all up to around 500 calories for this morning.

I ate 1/2 a cup of soup - totalling out around 90 calories and two apples (another 160) and some chicken from a frozen SmartOnes meal - but only the chicken. Just to be safe, I'm qualifing that at 100 calories instead of the 160 the box says. So ... that would be 850 thus far. Throw in a light dinner around 400 and perhaps a beer with it I'll be holding fast to my "not to exceed 1500 rule."

3/2 PM Update - let's do math!

Food roster so far ...

A delicious, yet high calorie bagel with 2 tablespoons of cream cheese - yikes, 600 calories.

Carrots for snacking - totaling around 100 calories.

That Mountain Dew I couldn't stop myself from drinking - 300 calories.

Soup for lunch - 180 calories.

So far for today = 1180 calories, which leaves me 320 calories for dinner. Okay, so I'm going to unwind with two beers at 80 a pop - so that's 160 and that leaves 160 for dinner. I'm thinking of soup - that will put me over just by 20 and I'll work it off prior at the gym :)

3/2

Weight: 153.5

To go?13.5 - 18.5
Vegas: 8.5
Summerfest: 13.25

Finally! The scale moved! I'm getting down there, I just have to stay focused and watch what I eat. It's a bit easier when the work shows on the scale ...

Today I did cardio, the knee raise machine, hip abductor and chest press. Signed up to go back tonight at 6 - would ideally like to do cardio, shoulder press and rowing machine. Gotta keep it up :) i'm already snacking on carrots.

What I look like today ...

Curves and all - here's a good shot of how my back looks (not turning around yet ...) after losing 40 lbs - hoping to trim it down a bit, but it doesn't look all too bad!

Snacking on Carrots ...

Did you know that 10.5 baby carrots is only 35 calories! Snack away :)

Weight: 154.5

So - that's down .75lbs which is good but could be better! I slipped a couple times last week and am determined not to do that this week.

I went to the gym at lunch again - that is always refreshing! It's going to be a late night, so I won't be able to hit it up again this evening but I will be there tomorrow morning. Besides that, I'm going to be entering into a photography contest, so I'll work on those photos tonight instead.

A Little Piece of Me

I just posted this on my other blog as well - but it show's promise. This is my waist, the left 1/2 of my body to be exact. standing almost butt naked. Check it out, it curves in and doesn't flop out! That's darn exciting right there!

Truth is I'm not ready to take it all off for the camera - but I am ready to show off bits and pieces to remind myself I'm fabulous and I absolutely adore this tattoo so why the hell not.

More pics to come to remind me of progress ...

Start of Three ...

I haven't been very fabulous lately, I've been very NOT fabulous. I'm going to try and go to the gym over lunch and again after work - after all we need to see where I'll be starting week three at - on the wagon, off it, underneath it's spinning wheels ...

I didn't over eat this weekend, so I'm hoping that's reflected on the scale when I get to the gym. My house is finally clean - now it's time to work on my desk and I'm going to put in some effort into finding a new job again (maybe one with a signing bonus).

The things I know I need to fix right now in my life are:

(1) MOVE OUT! I can't be independent in my dad's basement.
(2) Get financially somewhere, have a savings account.
(3) Look for a new job and get it - or the chance to get it.

I feel like if I can accomplish those three things, I can actually get on the road to feeling fabulous.

2/5

The inches made me very happy yesterday - gained 1 in the waste, stayed neutral in the chest but chucked two on the hips - so pretty good sign.

My knee throbbed this morning so I gave it a break from the AM workout - I plan on hitting the gym up after work though and getting in some kind of workout.

I'm chowing on a 600 calorie bagel right now, balanced out with an 80 calorie apple, I'm going to have to watch real close what else I consume today... for lunch I brought a SmartOnes 180 calorie shrimp marinara. Since it is the weekend, I'm going to try and stay around the 1500 mark today - but by lunch I'll have already chowed 940. Ouch.

I toyed with the idea of working out over lunch, but I'm more interested in getting out of here at a decent time tonight - so I'm not even going to pressure myself!